Posted in Faith, Family, Motherhood, Podcast - Dolly Mama and the Millennials

Holding Space for Yourself

And that’s when I heard it, “Hold space for them.”

“Hold space for them? What does that mean?” I asked God.

I sat there in my car in the parking lot of the addiction rehab I taught at and knew God was calling me to embark on a journey with these women. As I hung up the phone, I was caught by a sweep of His presence, as I felt the answer to my question settle in my spirit…Just show up every week and be there for them. Be present to their pain.

It’s been almost a year since I heard those words, “Hold space.” I’ve learned to stay present without a response. Without turning away from the pain of others. Loving without saying a word, giving each other space to feel. I’ve learned “holding space” is a beautiful way to sit with them in their pain. It’s finding the depth of love necessary to allow them to feel without judgment, without rushing in to clean it up or fix it. It’s standing beside one another offering hope without saying a word.

A few months ago, the Holy Spirit sweetly asked, “Yeah, but do you know how to hold space for yourself?” 

Hold space for me? There’s no time for that.

I’m learning what this means. In a season of five active kids, a dad fighting for his life, and a husband with a demanding job I’m finding I need more time for me. Often times our own self takes a back seat during busy seasons. The thing is, we can’t afford not to take care of our own soul. This is why David spoke to his soul, “Find rest, O my soul, in God alone” (Ps. 62:1,5). We live unawakened lives when we neglect our souls.

Join as I’m a guest on The Dolly Mama and the Millennials podcast where we talk about ways to hold space for ourselves and why it’s important. Laugh and cry with us for thirty minutes as we explore the need for soul-care and how to do that during this busy journey of motherhood.

–Lea Turner–

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN

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Thank you for taking the time to listen!  Please share this with anyone and everyone you know who has someone in their lives called children 🙂

Posted in Family, Motherhood

Hopefully No Mini-Mes on My Watch

“Today you are you.  That is truer than true.  There is no one alive that is youer than you.”  (Dr. Seuss)

Being a parent means supporting our kids to be fully who they are, not who we are or think they should be. It’s not about creating “Mini-MEs” but about birthing “YOUs”!!

For me, it means processing math lessons and listening to crazy student behavior with my teacher daughter, along with reminding her of how great of a mom she is on those tough days with a toddler (#allofthem)

It means hearing stories about ride-on mowers almost flipping over and buying chocolate muffins from Costco for my landscaper son.

It means asking (and then actually listening to the response) about the latest headphones on the market and being okay with my senior not wanting to walk at his college graduation.

Today, it means sitting in the back of a dark Sony sound studio after a very long flight and short night of sleep with my recording arts major watching her heart come alive and her dream come true! She does know what all those buttons do!

It’s not easy. It means we are stretched farther than we ever thought possible as we put aside our longing to hold them close and safe with the better choice of releasing them into the adventure of their own journeys!

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What ways (big and small) are you doing this today for those you love??

 

Posted in Family, Motherhood, Podcast - Dolly Mama and the Millennials

You Cannot Bestow What You Do Not Possess

What happens when your child can’t fall asleep because they are beating themself up for their mistakes made that day? You as a mom grapple with your own perfectionism?  See the same struggles in your child that you have?  Join me as I interview Jackie Thompson, a very gentle, wise, honest hope-bringer of two young children ages 5 and 8.   Jackie is a fourth-grade teacher and pastor’s wife who juggles working full-time and caring for her two precious children, along with being a wife, daughter, friend and mentor.   Explore a key parenting concept we’ve both learned the hard way, and how we imperfectly navigate it along our own mom journeys.  Laugh and cry and say, “Hmm.  Me too.” with us for 30 minutes as you get a sneak-peak behind the scenes of the beautiful, but messy motherhood path we are on.  The good news is that you will find hope for your own!

CLICK ON PODCAST LINK BELOW:

You Cannot Bestow What You Do Not Possess (An Interview with Jackie Thompson)

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Thank you for taking the time to listen!  Please share this with anyone and everyone you know who has someone in their lives called children 🙂

 

Today, I am SO EXCITED to be featured in a blog series about Enneagrams and Motherhood! I am a TYPE 8, which makes being a mom a pretty windy (long “I” sound) journey!  Please find the post by clicking below.  I am the last one at the bottom! So for all you Enneagram types out there, enjoy what you read and get a glimpse and some hope for your own parenting journeys!

Hey Friends! I hope your April is off to an amazing start. Its hard to believe that we are almost at the end of this incredible Enneagram and Motherhood series. 3,259 more words

via How the Enneagram Impacts your Motherhood – Types 4, 6 & 8 (Second Round of Mama’s Sharing) — Clarity With Charity

How the Enneagram Impacts your Motherhood – Types 4, 6 & 8 (Second Round of Mama’s Sharing) — Clarity With Charity

Posted in Family, Health, Podcast - Dolly Mama and the Millennials

SORRY NOT SORRY!

CONFLICT!  Some of us engage in it, enjoy it and view it as a form of communication that brings connection.  Others of us avoid it, despise it, and deem it the destroyer of relationships.  What about all that fighting we are in the middle of as parents?  Among our kids and also with them?  Who should say they’re sorry?  When should they say they’re sorry? How should they say they’re sorry?  What about forgiveness and reconciliation?  How do they happen?  When do they happen?  Who should forgive?  THIS BIG QUESTION is worked through:  should I make my child say “I’m sorry” when they’ve done something wrong and “I forgive you” when another apologizes?  Join me with Josh, my super wise 22-year old, as we let you in on my “fits-and-starts” journey with this never-ending parenting battle.

 

CLICK ON PODCAST LINK BELOW:

Sorry Not Sorry!

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Thank you for taking the time to listen!  Please share this with everyone who has conflict in their lives  (HINT:  it’s not just for parents)!

 

Posted in Faith, Motherhood

When You Blow It As A Mom

Dear Sweet Mama,

Blew it. Screamed at toddler.

Blew it again. Used guilt to get 10 year old to comply.

Blew it again. Alienated teen by comparing to “good” sibling.

Blew it again and again and again.

Today, you may feel far from your child. Not necessarily in miles, but in your heart. This child who threw their arms around you without a care in the world joyfully shouting, “I love you,” when he was three seems unreachable today in some ways.   You may wish you could go back and do it all differently. You might not have the relationship that you envisioned with this child. Along the way, you have hurt them and they have hurt you. You may not feel good inside today.

We are constantly bombarded with voices that say, “You only have one chance at being a parent.” “Your child’s moral compass is fully-developed by age five.” “You have to teach your senior these ten things before they leave for college.” Magazine articles, blog posts, podcasts, parenting books and even well-intentioned friends basically send this message: “Don’t mess this mom thing up!” “It will be too late before you know it!”

Today, Sweet Mama, in the middle of the mess of your heart, toss those very soul-killing, discouraging lies aside and hold on to this: your story is not done being written.   Your story as a mom. Your child’s story as a budding adult. The story of your relationship with your child. It is never too late!  It’s never too late to say I’m sorry. It’s never too late to get counsel. It’s never too late to do things differently. It’s never too late for redemption.  For you. Or your child.

God is the God of second chances and third, and fourth… In fact, He delights in them. He makes them His mission. He takes the seemingly hopeless and broken parts of us and infuses them with His healing and restoration. There is nothing too difficult for Him! Look UP and see Him beckoning you out of despair and discouragement into His life-giving courage and hope. He’s got you! He’s got your child! It’s really okay to rest your weary heart today!

“There aren’t do overs. But there are make overs.” (Bill Hybels)

From My Heart to Yours

Posted in Family, Motherhood, Podcast - Dolly Mama and the Millennials

Manuevering the Mammoth of Social Media (as Parents and Humans)

Social Media is a behemoth.  Instagram.  Snapchat.  Facebook.  Twitter.  OUR PHONE.  On and on and on.  Join Rachel and me as we work our way through the positives and negatives (for BOTH OF US) of the various platforms and how they play out currently in our mom/daughter relationship.  LISTEN closely to Rachel about the dangers she encounters on Instagram (her social media of choice) as a young #stillteenage woman and how she steers through the ins and outs and keeps her sanity and protects her self.  FIND OUT about some not-so-good parts of this Dolly Mama and my personal struggle with parenting through this very tumultuous medium.  You will find great hope for yourself and your own journey of maneuvering the mammoth as a human being and maybe even a parent.

 

CLICK ON PODCAST LINK BELOW:

Maneuvering the Mammoth of Social Media (as Parents and Humans)

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Thank you for taking the time to listen!  Please share this with everyone navigating the social media beast (HINT:  that’s everyone)!

Posted in Family, Motherhood

My Love for You is ______ Less (my mom letter)

Dear Child of My Heart,

I need you to know that I love you. I want you to know exactly what those three words mean when they are coming from my heart to yours.

I have told you that I love you more times than either of us can remember. That’s a good thing. You’ve heard it from the first day I held you in my arms and you are hearing it again today. You will hear it from me tomorrow, and next week, as long as my tongue allows. My love for you is COUNTLESS.

My love for you is the reason that sometimes I stay awake and worry. Yet, the fear that I have that my heart might break someday is quieted by the fierce love I have for you and the knowledge that it’s all worth it. You are worth it. My love for you is FEARLESS.

I loved you when you were minutes old.  I loved you when you were a “NO” screaming toddler.    I loved you when you were fighting with your siblings in grade school.  I loved you when you were a taller-than-me teenager.  I loved you when you walked away from me into your college dorm room.  I love you today.  I will love you all the tomorrows.  Nothing will change that.  My love for you is AGELESS.

It’s been a lot of work to be your mom. The lack of sleep and the amount of energy I’ve poured in have left me exhausted at times. But the life and joy and beauty you have brought me is beyond what I could have imagined. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.   My love for you is TIRELESS.

I don’t care who knows how much I love you. I would shout it from the highest mountain to any who would listen. Everyone should know how wonderful and amazing you are and why you are so worth loving. My love for you is SHAMELESS.

I never knew love like this before I met you. It reaches places in me that I didn’t know existed. It’s higher than the uphill battles we’ve climbed. It’s wider than any mistake either of us make. It’s stronger than death. It’s longer than life. My love for you is DEPTHLESS.

No matter how many times I attempt to capture it in words, I am left dumb-founded. My love for you is more sacred than speech allows. My love for you is more precious than all the books that could ever be written. It’s easy to love you. My love for you is BOUNDLESS.

My love for began the first moment I found out about you and will continue until I take my last breath. You will carry it with you long after I am gone, until the moment you enter eternity yourself. We will then be reunited in perfect love on the other side. My love for you is ENDLESS.

The next time you hear me say them, even if it’s just a quick text, remember all of this. These three words come straight from the depths of my soul and I pray that they reach yours today.

“Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.” (Elizabeth Stone)

From my heart to yours,

Mom

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Sarah 5th Birthday_0004P.S.  One of you is having a birthday today!  Happy Birthday Sarah Elizabeth Meassick!  On this day 27 years ago, you made me a mom!  I. CAN’T. EVEN. BELIEVE. IT.  You are a mom yourself now, but no matter how many birthdays or children of your own you have, you are (and always will be) MY:

Princess
Peanut
Doodle
Sunshine
Beep
And DOLLY!

 

Posted in Anxiety, Family, Health, Motherhood, Podcast - Dolly Mama and the Millennials

How My Anxiety Effected My Parenting

Join me as I speak with Josh (our 22 year-old) about how my “nervous breakdown” and subsequent anxiety disorder informed my parenting.  Find out the answers to these questions:  how did crippling fear effect my decisions as a mom and what changed as I began to heal?  Enjoy funny stories as part of the crazy!  If you struggle with anxiety/fear as a parent (and I know I am not the only one), this podcast is for you!!!  (Bear with audio issues…I’m building the plane as I fly it!  It will get better!)

 

CLICK ON PODCAST LINK BELOW:

https://anchor.fm/esther18/episodes/Episode-6-How-My-Anxiety-Effected-My-Parenting-e2qjpl

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Thank you for taking the time to listen!  Please share this with anyone you know who is beginning the parenting journey, in the middle of the mess, or still navigating it all with adult children!!  It’s powerful stuff!

Posted in Faith, Family, Motherhood, Podcast - Dolly Mama and the Millennials

The Trust Twist

What happens when our child spills their milk? Fails a fourth-grade test and hides it from us? Struggles with the more complicated teen issues?  Join me as I interview Melony Bishop, a very kind, wise, brave hope-bringer of three children ages 12, 15 and 17. She shines some much-needed light on this parenting path that is not well-marked.  Explore the idea of reciprocal trust with us, and how this forever changed our own mothering and why it is key in the raising of our children. Enjoy 30 minutes of laughter, tears and deep insight as you get a peak behind the scenes of our not-so-perfect parenting journeys. Find hope for your own!

CLICK ON PODCAST LINK BELOW:

https://anchor.fm/esther18/episodes/Episode-5-The-Trust-Twist-An-Interview-with-Melony-Bishop-e331le

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Thank you for taking the time to listen!  Please share this with anyone you know who is beginning the parenting journey, in the middle of the mess, or still navigating it all with adult children!!  It’s powerful stuff!